Widowed Mom Tip: Grieve the Mother you WERE to Embrace the Mother you ARE
May 11, 2023Mother's Day is this Sunday.
While I don't feel the anticipation of this milestone like a used to in early grief, I'm viscerally aware of how much the death of a partner, a child or mother changes this day for you.
Mother's Day just hits differently. 💔
Generally speaking, when someone you love dies, the entire family dynamic changes; which also affects the role you wore in relation to that person.
The child with no mother
The mother with no child
The mother with no father figure (and vice versus)
The brother with no sibling
You still wear the role, but your whole identity and being in that role shifts with a life-altering loss.
A harsh realization in my grief journey was recognizing just this!
✨I wasn’t the same mom after my husband’s death. She died with daddy. 💀
I didn’t understand this for a long time. In fact, I resisted it thinking I could still do everything on my own, and then I’d beat myself up when I couldn’t.
I wondered why I no longer felt connected to my kids or even enjoyed motherhood at all anymore! Truthfully, I felt trapped by them – at times suffocated by this new reality because no, I didn’t sign up to do this ALONE!
And when I finally admitted it out loud, the guilt and shame would then roll in.
But I couldn't escape the feelings of resentment, the constant fear that I was failing, and that sense of freedom that I was craving outside of motherhood.
It wasn't until I looked within and realized that the overall dissatisfaction I was experiencing in motherhood was not just from my husband dying, it was also from trying to force myself into a paradigm that no longer fit.
Maybe you aren't a widowed mom, but if you've felt this resistance ... maybe the same is true for you❓
When I realized that I couldn’t be the mom I WAS when I had a living partner
When I freed myself from subconscious conditioning and an outdated paradigm around the mother I thought I SHOULD BE, and
When I started to get curious about WHO I WAS now (post-loss) and what kind of a mother I
wanted to BE
I felt more joy, more ease, more satisfaction and LOVE in raising two young kids alone! So that's why ...
🎉I'm excited to announce that I'm bringing back a totally revamped version of Motherhood My Way to help other widowed mama in the moveTHRU community do the same! 🎉
In this month-long mini course I'll help you:
🖤 Grieve the mom you WERE
🖤 Let go of the mom you SHOULD BE, to
🖤 Embrace the mom you ARE!
By connecting you back to you tribe, you kids, the motherhood paradigm and your SELF.
Learn more about the Motherhood My Way mini course.
If you are not a widowed mom, but know one who this program could support, I invite you to share this post! Thank you so much for helping me spread the word.
Mother's Day hits differently for all of us. Sending some extra love and tenderness to you all this week.
Stay tuned, friends! 💖
Emily
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